Cruise Control

Not too much new to report. I'm feeling very well. In fact I realized today that it seems like I'm riding along on cruise control. Things are going well. Chemo has become a part of life and I seem to be fairly used to it and know a bit more of what to expect. We're just counting down the rounds one at a time. One year of treatment will be complete by mid September. When I started they told me I would do it for at least a year but no longer than 18 months. So my prayers are begging to be done in September. In the meantime I've realized to appreciate the health I have right now and that most of my days are good. I'm living a fairly normal life and I can play with Luke just like before all this was a part of our life. So things are good for us.
There's a song that plays over and over in my head and it has seemed to help me find peace. I can't tell you who wrote it but it goes like this, "I'm not skilled to understand what God has willed, what God has planned............" It's helped me to let go of the "WHY." I don't get it. I don't know if I will ever understand but I've realized we don't have to get it we just have to trust in God. Letting go of why is hard, and I still fight it but I'm getting closer.

Take care,
Jessie

P.S. I was a Grey's Anatomy fan but currently it's rotten! Those of you who are watching will know why!!!!

FRUSTRATION

Tonight will be the last night for round #8 that I will take chemo but the effect usually lasts through early next week. This treatment has been tolerable. I've had some stomach pain and nausea but has been better than some prior treatments. The most annoying part is the ridiculous fatigue. Chemo stinks.

Last night we received news that Leslie's cancer has spread now to her lungs. I don't know many of the details but apparently it's in the lining of her lungs. I have never met Leslie in person but she has become someone very special to me. She in one of the few people who could really relate to what I am going through and encourage me and I hope I've been able to do the same for her. Leslie has been very ill for a very long time now. I'm crushed by this news but I can only imagine how heartbreaking this is for her husband Tyson and little TJ. I'm asking for you to pray for miraculous healing and that she will be well and with her boys soon. To follow her journey and get updates you can go to www.forleslie.blogspot.com

That's all for today. I'm at a loss for words.
Love, Jessie